The Kelce brothers, Derek Wolfe and a real-life ‘Animal House’

PHOENIX — “127 West Nixon.”

With those three words, the face of Eagles center Jason Kelce lit up as though he were a 6-year-old on Christmas morning.

You recite that address to anyone who called that spot in Cincinnati home in the late 2000s and early 2010s, and you’ll get that response.

And those that called it home included a crew of University of Cincinnati football players that included the Kelce brothers — Jason and his younger brother, Chiefs tight end extraordinaire Travis — as well as a two-time CFL Most Outstanding Player Zach Collaros … and former Broncos standout and 104.3 The Fan host Derek Wolfe.

They, along with college teammates Evan Davis, Alex Hoffman and Craig Parmenter, were among those living together in this house near campus.

Davis’ parents owned the home. It had a roof and plenty of rooms. But it had problems. For one thing, none of the doors locked. Although plenty of those issues spurred from the residents themselves.

“Not even the front door,” Wolfe said. “It was a madhouse. We were out of control. We used Natty Light boxes to patch holes in the wall.”

From that ramshackle house came three Super Bowl winners, a three-time Grey Cup champion and arguably the best tight end ever to play the game.

“Probably the most fun times of my life, to be honest with you,” Jason Kelce said. “I’m hesitant to say that, now that I’ve got kids and everything like that. But, man, we had a lot of fun years at the University of Cincinnati.  Had a lot of really good teams.

“And the guys that lived in that house, it was like a real-life ‘Animal House.’ It was a lot of fun. We all were like brothers there. My actual brother and I lived in the house. Yeah, man. Just lifelong memories and friendships and — a few drinks.”

Ah, yes.

“We worked hard, and we played hard, too,” Wolfe remembered.

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THE CRAZIEST THING THEY SAW WOLFE DO …

It was a different answer for both Kelces, but their responses both involved furniture.

Said Jason: “Wolfie was a wrestler growing up, and for some reason, we had a mattress sitting in the living room. It was just sitting there. And him and one of the other guys, Craig Parmenter, started getting into it, wrestling, and before we knew it, the mattress was laying on top of Craig Parmenter and Wolfie was jumping off of the couch onto the mattress like it was a WWE wrestling match in the living room.

“We all thought it was just the funniest thing we had ever seen, and it was — everybody was laughing. Craig came up with a bloody lip, and then we got a Popsicle out of the freezer, and he put that on it. It was — in the moment, it was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life … I can’t even describe it, and part of it was Craig, underneath the mattress, just enjoying being jumped on and slammed on top of. It was just complete mania and hysteria all happening at once.”

“Mania” and “hysteria” are accurate descriptions of the existence at 127 West Nixon. Jason said each of them took turns being the wildest of the bunch.

But even among this band, there was something different about Wolfe.

“Man, I’ve seen that guy tear apart a living room — that I once enjoyed,” Travis recalled. “I used to love the couch that he threw out of the living room. I used to love the recliner that was in there.”

Which begged my simple follow-up question: Why?

I thought to myself, “What on earth would compel Wolfe to be a part of destroying a living-room set?” I had to know. This was now the only story I wanted out of Super Bowl week.

“You’ll have to ask him!” Travis told me.

So, I did.

“Doing some drinking, and things got a little out of hand,” Wolfe said.

“Here’s how it started: It started because our left tackle (Hoffman) — who was my roommate, as well — he was a biology major. He didn’t want to come out, because he had to study,” Wolfe said. “So, I went up there and was like, ‘Let’s go! We’re going out!’ We had been pregaming. … So, he was studying, and he got, like, an attitude about it.

“He said something that got me fired up, so, I took his couch out of his room and threw it out the front door.”

This isn’t the sofa Travis referenced. This was another sofa — on the second floor. Wolfe heaved it down the stairs, then threw it out the front door — on which the lock didn’t work, of course.

“So we left and went out,” Wolfe continued, “and then we go out to a bar or somewhere, get even more tuned up, come back, and I was just all fired up.”

When they came back, Travis was done. He went to his room to sleep, not knowing that when he awoke, his beloved living-room set would be mangled lawn furniture.

Wolfe takes it from here:

“And next thing I know, I was wrestling with my other roommate — who was an offensive lineman, as well — and I slammed him on the floor and then, I went upstairs and grabbed his mattress and threw his mattress downstairs and jumped off the top of the stairs onto the mattress, onto him.

“He hit me with a couch cushion, and so I just took the couch cushion and — BOW! — smacked him as hard as I could with it.”

In the midst of the wrestling, Wolfe was “fake-choke-slammed” into the couch.

“That’s what broke the couch,” he said.

“And then then I took our couch and threw it out into the front … It was our couch, it was the house couch. But it was a trash couch. It was done. And I threw it out in the front yard. And then I took a recliner and threw it out in the front yard, because it was done.

“They were ruined. The wrestling match ruined them.”

When Travis arose and strode into the living room, it was all gone. One visualizes perhaps the greatest tight end in the history of football, looking around like Will Smith in an empty house from “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.”

“I woke up and it was out there on the front lawn,” he said.

Somehow, despite nights like that, the house remained standing.

“Evan’s parents owned the house, and they were like, ‘What is wrong with you guys?’” Wolfe recalled.

But years later, one can’t argue with the results. Not with how many Super Bowl winners and even a CFL star QB came from 127 West Nixon.

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SO, WHICH KELCE WILL WOLFE SUPPORT?

Travis and Wolfe entered UC in the same year and had more time together. Jason was already there, and by the time Wolfe entered the NFL, he already had a season with the Eagles under his belt. Both Kelces already have a Super Bowl ring, so the angle of wanting one to finally get over the hump is not in play.

So …

“I would hope he takes mine, because we’re in the same class,” Travis said. “We came in the same year. Jason’s never been back to Lisbon, Ohio, so, I’m going to say it’s me, for sure.”

Indeed, “I used to take Travis back all the time,” Wolfe said. “Just go back to field parties … keggers.”

Jason was more neutral than his younger brother.

“Man. I don’t know. I think Derek will root for both of us,” he said. “Luckily we’re both on offense, so, I think he’s probably going to hope that both of us have a good game.

“And the fact that he played such a long time in Denver, hopefully he’s rooting for the Eagles!” concluded Jason with a laugh.

The verdict?

“Secretly, I’d like Travis to win,” Wolfe said — under his breath — during the Feb. 7 edition of The Drive. “But I don’t say it, because the Broncos people lose their minds!”

Then, Wolfe added, “You know what, I don’t care anymore!”

He might not care what his Broncos buddies think about his rooting interest. But he’ll always care about his college housemates — as they all do about each other. They forged a brotherhood. And from a forest of beer crates, destroyed furniture and general lunacy came success the likes of which they couldn’t have imagined.

“I don’t think any of us knew it back then,” Jason said. “We all knew we were really good college players. I think everybody knew that Wolfe probably had the best NFL chances at that time, because he was so big, strong, had long arms. Trav was a little bit of an unknown at the time, too, because he had just gotten kicked off the team at that point. But no, I don’t think any of us expected to have Super Bowls, Grey Cups, long, illustrious NFL careers.

“That all has been an awesome byproduct of the hard work, blood, sweat, tears of joy that came out of that house.”

A house that, somehow, is still standing.

127 West Nixon.

Where champions were made — and furniture wrecked.

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